Certainly I must be getting better by now. Yesterday, though, really whacked me hard and I honestly don't know why. I did a couple hours of work work for my job, a bit of reading and went grocery shopping with my husband for the first time since surgery. And, damn, if I wasn't totally out of energy by 3:00 p.m. I did take a Vicodin at noon...just couldn't hold out any longer. But otherwise it was what I would consider a slow, lazy day in my book. Yes, yes, I know I am recuperating and there is a reason why they tell you to take six weeks off from work. There is also a reminder in the surgery handbook that states something like 'just because you are staying home that does not give you an excuse to engage in home chores and regular activities.' Yeah, I know. But I gotta be me...and that just sucks sometimes because I am such a go-go-go person. My mind is running but my body can't keep up right now. It's a hard compromise to make. We did eventually walk downtown late evening in order for me to do the stairs in the park. For the first time since surgery I honestly thought I was not going to make it home. My legs were like jelly and I had odd pains everywhere: my buttocks were sore, my right side was going into muscle spasms and there were all sorts of 'electrical' twinges around the incision areas. It was quite scary and humbling. The body will tell you when it is done. It will tell you to slow down. It will shout at you to give it a rest. Sometimes I'm just hard of hearing and my body makes me slow down to give it a chance to recoup. When we got home from the walk I took another Vicodin and a Robaxin (muscle relaxer), cleaned up and hit the bed. Ahhhhhh...never more happy to be in my own bed.
One of my favorite authors Michael Perry states in his best selling book Truck: A Love Story: "We are in possession of a machine that is set on self-destruct." That, my friends, is our body...plain and simple. Those of us who have gone through any surgery need to be aware that as with any machine we must treat it with kindness and try to get the most miles out of it. It is up to us to listen to the doctors orders...to heed them fully and not rush the natural healing process. I have to write this to myself so I can read it and it will sink just a bit more into my hard head. My husband stated the obvious last evening; "Yes, the doctor said you could walk all you want....but I don't think he meant all at one time."
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